Ever since he started to walk, my toddler has been less interested in food. How can I be sure that he is getting enough to eat?
Don’t worry. It is perfectly normal for toddlers to suddenly become less interested in food when they begin to walk, which, for most infants, happens between nine and sixteen months of age. In fact, with so many new things to explore and discover, what child has time to sit down and eat?
At the same time, children are so active at this age that their body needs food on a regular basis, even if they do not feel hungry. Offering them meals or snacks four to five times a day will ensure that they have enough fuel to play and grow. If your child consistently refuses snack foods and meals, make sure he is not filling up on juice or milk. Between the ages of one and six, limit fruit juice intake to no more than four to six ounces (120 to 180 ml.) per day, diluting the juice to make it go further. Cow’s milk is an important part of a toddler’s diet, but children between the ages of one and five should drink no more than 24 ounces (709 ml.) of milk each day. If your child is thirsty in between meals, offer water to drink.
All children need regularly scheduled meals and a selection of healthy foods from which to choose. However, when and how much your child eats, or even if your child eats at all, should ultimately be up to him. By continually telling your child that he is hungry or has had enough to eat, he won't learn to recognize the signs that tell him when he is hungry and when he is done. In fact, children who are never allowed to make food decisions for themselves are at a greater risk for developing eating disorders or becoming obese later in life.
There are probably days when it feels like your child has refused everything you put in front of him. Rather than focusing on the days he doesn’t seem to eat, start keeping a record of what your child does eat. Most parents are surprised to find that their child's food intake balances out over time. During a week’s period, he's likely to be hitting all the major food groups and getting what he needs.
Children are very good at self-regulation—they may eat almost nothing one day and the next day they may eat more food than you do. The types of food they eat may also vary from day to day. They may be interested in nothing but fruits and vegetables for a few days, cheese and crackers for the next, and then return to a normal meal routine. You should also adjust your view of how much your child needs to eat by appreciating that many children eat much smaller portions of food than adults do.
Finally, because your toddler has such a short attention span, it may seem that he can’t sit still long enough to eat very much at one sitting. However, children are generally good at eating what they need to, even if it doesn't seem like much to you. In any case, you can try to keep your child at the table longer by keeping mealtimes calm and regular and with few distractions like toys, TV, or books. To make the most out of meal and snack times, try to relax and enjoy this time with your child. If you constantly hover over him at mealtime, begging him to eat while monitoring every bite that goes into his mouth, he is likely to become even more resistant to eating. Just continue to offer a variety of healthy foods without making a big fuss and trust your child to eat what he needs. It is worth keeping track of your toddler’s weight gain and growth, and staying in touch with your child’s health care provider.
Is it possible to have a "family dinnertime" with a toddler?
With increasingly busy schedules and responsibilities, families find that dinnertime is often the only time during the day that they can sit down and enjoy each other’s company. When you have a toddler, though, sitting down for a meal together often means fighting over food: what's on the menu, who's eating (or not eating) what, and how much is everyone eating.
To reduce mealtime stress, try to focus on the fact that everyone is finally together rather than focus on the food on the table. For example, talk about exciting things that happened during the day or about an upcoming event that is interesting to your child. Fix one meal for the entire family rather than making separate dishes for your toddler. He may not eat very much, but try not to make a fuss over it. It may take weeks or months, but eventually he will begin to eat what you offer. He won't starve if he doesn't eat anything for one or two meals.
Don’t turn eating into a reward and punishment cycle. While your mom may have rewarded you for eating all your vegetables with a bowl of ice cream after dinner, this only taught you that vegetables were the punishment and dessert was the reward. Try a different approach. During each meal, serve at least one food you know your toddler likes. Clear the table when the meal is over, even if he hasn’t eaten all his food. If he wants dessert, give it to him without much fanfare, but vary what you serve.
My toddler is a fussy eater and I’m worried that he isn’t getting enough variety in his diet. What can I do to get him to try new foods?
Toddlers can be finicky eaters. One minute they're in love with a particular dish and the next minute they won't eat a bite of it. Next, they'll decide they hate something like kiwi fruit without ever having tried it. It's also common for them to insist on eating the same few foods repeatedly at every meal, while turning up their noses at anything new.
How did the infant who happily ate up any baby food placed before him turn into an increasingly fussy toddler? Children this age are becoming aware of their ability to make decisions. They also enjoy pushing the limits you set to see what response they get from you. While this can be very frustrating, it is a normal part of your toddler’s development. In addition, toddlers like things to be familiar, their bedtime routine, for example. Most kids won't try new foods until they've been exposed to them at least three or four times.
Realize that expecting your toddler to eat a wide range of foods may be unrealistic and is usually not necessary. Even though it seems impossible, most fussy eaters obtain enough calories and nutrients from their regular diet. Don’t worry that your child will starve if he doesn't have as varied a menu as you do. As long as your child is gaining weight, growing taller, and has had no developmental problems, he's doing just fine. Make sure that you go over these items with your health care provider at every check-up.
Try to remember that your child's decision to eat only a few foods is just that, his decision, and it's important that you let him learn to make his own decisions. To avoid future eating problems, make sure his diet is healthy and that the things he does eat are good for him, such as fruits, vegetables, cereals, milk products, poultry or fish. Encourage him to eat all types of food. Your child’s initial rejection of a new food shouldn't be interpreted as a permanent dislike. He may have to try the food a few more times to decide whether he likes it
or not. If he refuses to try a particular food, don't force the issue. Don't stop offering it, though. When presented a food enough times, most toddlers will eventually try it. No matter how fussy your child seems, keep offering him a wide variety of foods to eat. If you stick to his "favorite" foods without any additions, he’ll never learn to try new foods and the list of those he won't eat will only grow longer.
Coping with fussy, erratic eating can be frustrating. To help deal with it, understand your role well and know you have done the best you can. Remember that, as the parent, your is to offer a wide variety of healthy foods on a regular, predictable schedule.
Tips on dealing with a fussy eater:
- Provide a variety of healthy foods at each meal.
- Present new foods frequently throughout the week. Bear in mind that it takes multiple exposures for a child to accept new foods as okay.
- Always include at least one thing you know your child likes at each meal. Offering new foods along with old favorites may help your toddler feel more comfortable with trying something new.
- Offer limited choices. For example, ask, "Do you want grape juice or apple juice?" instead of "What do you want to drink?"
- Serve small, toddler-size portions; too much on the plate can make your child feel overwhelmed.
- Foods should be easy to chew, since toddlers may have a hard time with tough or hard foods. Make sure the food is bite-sized to avoid choking hazards.
- Try changing the location of your toddler’s meals. For example, have a picnic in the backyard during lunchtime or turn a snack into an afternoon tea party.
- Toddlers enjoy playing with their food—this is how they learn about what they are eating. Allow for an occasional handful of pudding spread on the table or a tower of cheese cubes built up and knocked down on the plate.
- Toddlers like to feel a sense of control over their environment, including their diets. Whenever possible let him chose between two fruits or two vegetables, for instance.
- Capture your child’s interest by making food attractive and fun. For example, arrange food in the shape of an animal or a face.
- Toddlers learn by imitating what they see. Eat as a family as often as you can and try to eat the foods you would like your toddler to eat. For example, reach for carrot sticks or an apple for a snack rather than a bag of potato chips.
Updated October 2003
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